The Chuffington Post

That's a pretty good epitaph. Bob died aged 59 in a road accident, when his car overturned on the M1 (no-one knows why) while he was driving to London. His wife Ann was also injured, but recovered to become his successor as MP for Keighley. Their son John is currently the member for Leyton & Wanstead, 200 miles away from the city of Bradford where Bob was born and where his gravestone stands now, in Undercliffe Cemetery. With the best will in the world Bradford isn't a beautiful place but Undercliffe cemetery is probably its most attractive spot, especially for anyone who likes graveyards. JB Priestley lies there as well, along with numerous Octaviuses, Jeremiahs, Mary Anns and Sarahs. The old Pennine tradition of giving boys first names that should be surnames produced the likes of Bassett Banes and Fountain Read. If Bradley Hardacre had really existed I expect his grave would lie in the cemetery as well. There are numerous huge, impressive towers and monuments er...

No wonder Peppa Pig looks upset. She's been mocked on Twitter for choosing the wrong wine to go with her swill. That's a bit like the fate that befell a young woman (she has a degree and works for Deliveroo, so she's probably got enough on her plate with a £50,000 debt) who was last night's social media laughing stock. She was unwise enough to tweet her anger at discovering that the pizza she'd bought for £4 from Sainsbury's had meat in it. She didn't know that Prosciutto Cotto meant Ham, you see. What an ignoramus! Naturally, it goes without saying that I didn't know, till last night, what Prosciutto Cotto is, either. Today I passed by a shop advertising Chicken Mole. That's something new to me as well. Either it's a very strange hybrid of two very different animals, or a mole who runs away at the first sign of danger. Because I live in Sheffield I see a lot of stuff on Twitter about tree-felling. There is a very well organised campaign...